Rank the current writers

Bohdan

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Inspired by the same directors thread, let's rank the writers.
In alphabethic order: Joel H. Cohen * John Frink * Freelancers* under Al Jean * Freelancers under Matt Selman * Tom Gammill & Max Pross * Dan Greaney * Al Jean * Brian Kelley * Ryan Koh * Rob LaZebnik * Tim Long (& Miranda Thompson) * Jeff Martin * Carolyn Omine * Michael Price * Matt Selman * J. Stewart Burns * Dan Vebber * Jeff Westbrook (18 points)

*FYI, as freeancers I always mean those writes, who:
1) got writer credit only once (actual freelancers);
2) got < 3 credits thoughtout all show, so it's hard to indicate their quality (i.e. Megan Amram, Cesar Mazariegos, Elisabeth Kiernan Averick etc.);
3) have a long gap between episodes (i.e. David Cohen);
4) skip regularry more than 1 production cycles (like Michael Ferris, David Stern, so on)


P.S. We all know, that "writer wrote episode" means "bunch of writers work on it, but only one is credited". However, there are some features for every "credited" writer
 
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I won't name all, and this is not complete.

First: Carolyn Omine (easily.)

Somewhere good: J. Stewart Burns and Dan Vebber (Cesar Mazariegos has only written one episode, but it was good.)

Mixed Bag: Freelancers. They can be good, or bad. Al Jean is there as well, because of Daddicus Finch, but 7 Beer Itch

5th Last: Joel H. Cohen (He was bad in Season 30, but Hateful 8 Year Olds was great.)
4th Last: Tim Long
3rd Last: John Frink
2nd Last: Ryan Koh
Last: Jeff Westbrook.
 
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Al Jean is there as well, because of Daddicus Finch, but 7 Beer Itch

His 3 modern "standalone" episodes are really good, but when he coworked with sbd, he looses his pottential.
 
I spent some time and here is my list (again I've properly seen last 1, 2 and even 3 episodes credited to the writer)

1. Carolyn Omine
2. Dan Vebber
3. Brian Kelley
4. Freelancers under Matt Selman
5. Freelancers under Al Jean
6. J. Stewart Burns
7. Al Jean
8. John Frink
9. Michael Price
10. Joel H. Cohen
11. Dan Greaney
12. Jeff Martin
13. Rob LaZebnik
14. Jeff Westbrook
15. Ryan Koh
16. Tim Long (& Miranda Thompson)
17. Tom Gammill & Max Pross
18. Matt Selman
 
1. J. Stewart Burns
2. Brian Kelley
3. Carolyn Omine
4. Dan Vebber
5. Matt Selman(though he may not write again)
6. Al Jean
7. Joel H. Cohen
8. Dan Greaney
9. John Frink
10. Ryan Koh
11. Jeff Martin
12. Michael Price
13. Rob LaZebnik
14. Tom Gammil & Max Pross
15. Tim Long
16. Jeff Westbrook

A lot towards the end are kinda free form, so take it with a grain of salt.
 
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I spent some time and here is my list (again I've properly seen last 1, 2 and even 3 episodes credited to the writer)

1. Carolyn Omine
2. Dan Vebber
3. Brian Kelley
4. Freelancers under Matt Selman
5. Freelancers under Al Jean
6. J. Stewart Burns
7. Al Jean
8. John Frink
9. Michael Price
10. Joel H. Cohen
11. Dan Greaney
12. Jeff Martin
13. Rob LaZebnik
14. Jeff Westbrook
15. Ryan Koh
16. Tim Long (& Miranda Thompson)
17. Tom Gammill & Max Pross
18. Matt Selman

You think Matt Selman is an even worse writer than Tim Long and Jeff Westbrook?
 
Again, I saw on his last works. I didn't like "The Clown Stays in the Picture" nor "Hearbreak Hotel" and pretty cold to "The Great Phatsby".

Yes, he used to be really good, (i.e. "Sky Police", "The Day the Earth Stood Cool" or "Oh Brother, Where Bart Thou?" are hits, imho), but (as it said) "he lost his charm in writing".
As for Jeff Westbrook or Tim Long, now they are stable bad-to-mediocre-to-decent. of cource Long was "really crazy" in seasons 22-24, luckly he held from VABF cycle, to good return with "Springfied Splendor"

That's just my opinion, based on their 3 last episodes.
 
My rankings are always in flux, but I'd say J. Stewart Burns, Dan Vebber, Brian Kelley and Carolyn Omine are among the top 5.
 
I wanted to do my ranking but it was just impossible. The writing in this show is quite inconsistent and examples of that are the flashforward episodes written by J. Stewart Burns or the Halloween-themed specials written by Carolyn Omine.

The reasons for those discrepancies are a lot: showrunners have a lot of influence (just compare the record of Vebber with Selman and with Jean), some episodes feel like written by the entire staff and the original draft is lost, for the most part. Some writers are more comfortable with certain characters or situations (Matt Selman is a genius but he is just mediocre writing stories in the past).

Just to provide an attempt of an answer, I am always looking forward to episodes penned by J. Stewart Burns and Carolyn Omine, Burns is the surest guarantee for me (because I enjoy even the universally most hated episodes) while Carolyn Omine rarely fails in the last years.

Dan Vebber has an awesome record along with Matt Selman, but the repertory is really weak along with Al Jean. To a lesser extent, the same happens with Brian Kelley (but with lower highs and higher lows).

Al Jean and Matt Selman are brilliant writers but they are more focused on their role of showrunner. I am in favor of that at least with Selman. I'd like to watch an episode written by Jean and produced by Selman, although that seems impossible.

Dan Greaney, John Frink, and Michael Price are quite inconsistent. Rob LaZebnik is really mediocre with one or two exceptions. Same with Gammill and Pross, but with fewer exceptions.

Tim Long, Joel Cohen, Jeff Martin, Ryan Koh, and Jeff Westbrook are my least favorite. Koh seems unable to write something slightly funny (let's see if he achieves it with Selman), while Westbrook is accredited to a bunch of the worst episodes of all time and nothing truly remarkable.
 
While I'd really like to rank all the prominent writers of the current era due to me having an interest in the writing side of things (though the freelancers would be difficult since many of them only have written one or maybe two episodes), I would unfortunately deem it fairly impossible due to the very uneven output with the quality of the scripts being all up and down (like [MENTION=75686]Szyslak100[/MENTION] stated). To make things simple, I would say that Joel H Cohen, Jeff Westbrook & Ryan Koh are three of the bottom of the barrel ones while Carolyn Omine, Brian Kelley & Dan Vebber are on the opposite end (I guess J Stewart Burns too, but only when he's motivated and doesn't churn out garbage like 'The D'oh-Cial Network' or 'Every Man's Dream').
 
i don't know how i would exactly rank every single current writer because of several factors like the simpsons crew's writing process, showrunner etc. but

the cream of the crop from the top of my head based on what i've seen up to early s31 are:
1. carolyn omine - her track record since halloween of horror has almost all been hits
2. dan vebber - he seems to write some pretty solid hd episodes under selman like the book job and thanksgiving of horror although his output under jean is a bit of a mixed bag

bottom of the barrel from the top of my head are:
1. ryan koh - all of his efforts so far are trite, unfunny misses such as singin in the lane and dad behavior. leave it up to him to somehow botch a really simplistic premise like that of singing in the lane.
2. jeff westbrook - wreck of the relationship and nightmare after krustmas were alright but besides that? ooof, the rest of his track record ranges from painfully mediocre to awful with some duds like caper chase. not a good sign for u as a simpsons writer if your first effort is on a clear day i can't see my sister.
3. tim long - his more recent output honestly isn't the worst. in fact, springfield splendor is fairly solid although tbf, that was under selman. however, he churned out some real duds earlier in the hd era such as the two s24 spuckler episodes
 
[MENTION=75172]Purpleberries[/MENTION] Did you stop watching the show? I remember reading your reviews of episodes from season 29 when I just logged in to the forum, haha.
 
Before reading any other responses Im just going to quickly come in and put Carolyn Omine and Matt Selman in first thank you
 
i don't know how i would exactly rank every single current writer because of several factors like the simpsons crew's writing process, showrunner etc. but

the cream of the crop from the top of my head based on what i've seen up to early s31 are:
1. carolyn omine - her track record since halloween of horror has almost all been hits
2. dan vebber - he seems to write some pretty solid hd episodes under selman like the book job and thanksgiving of horror although his output under jean is a bit of a mixed bag

bottom of the barrel from the top of my head are:
1. ryan koh - all of his efforts so far are trite, unfunny misses such as singin in the lane and dad behavior. leave it up to him to somehow botch a really simplistic premise like that of singing in the lane.
2. jeff westbrook - wreck of the relationship and nightmare after krustmas were alright but besides that? ooof, the rest of his track record ranges from painfully mediocre to awful with some duds like caper chase. not a good sign for u as a simpsons writer if your first effort is on a clear day i can't see my sister.
3. tim long - his more recent output honestly isn't the worst. in fact, springfield splendor is fairly solid although tbf, that was under selman. however, he churned out some real duds earlier in the hd era such as the two s24 spuckler episodes

oh wait nvm about ryan koh's whole output being complete trite. i forgot about krusty, the clown. that one is pretty okay.
 
For some reason I decided to review all writers' and directors' effort, and write here more detailed stuff.

First of all: what makes writer "good"? In my opinion, 1) remembering that fact, that "only if the writer wrote, at least, 30% of plot, the episode can be good". Sure, it's more related to modern episodes, where there are much "time filler" gags, jokes etc. So, to check that thing, my advice, try to watch random episode, focused only on story arc, and skipping any "time fillers". If the outcome's time is about "30% of whole episode length", than writer effort is good; 2) also the episode is good written, when writing and directing are coordinated with each other (example: there is any imagination bubble with good jokes, related to the plot - in my view).

Next, my description on current writers (based on their-written episodes):
J. Stewart Burns
"Screenless" (season 31, SR AJ) - not great writer's effort, but it felt Burns was motivated to write initial draft. The episode was good because of well work with director (Polchino).
"The Miseducation of Lisa Simpson" (season 31, SR MS) - I saw, Burns probably was motivated just with the start as: "Sea Captain tragedy, he got taken his treasure and give to the town, and then... [other writers' work]". As a result, the start of episode was the best part.
"TH30" - 99% he was just credited as "writer", while his effort wasn't felt at all:oops:|
"Flanders' Ladder" and "Dogtown" (SR AJ) - dark season 29 & 28 finales, but the former considered as the best of season by people because of emotion and motivation in that story.

Conclusion: 1) never minds, who's showrunner (on Selman's side there is "Steal This Episode" AND "The Miseducation of Lisa Simpson"; while on Jean's side there are more hits - "Holidays of Future Passed", "Fland Canyon", aforementioned Flanders' Ladder, BUT also misses as "Every Man's Dream", "Dogtown" and "The D'oh-cial Network");
2) his episodes anyway have interesting story (or story-telling) twists;
3) motivation in stories is really important - it determines, whether the episode is hit or miss;
4) statistically made by me:D, he's more good, when write near the middle of prod. season (eps 09-14)
5) Overall 5.71/10 - hit-or-miss writer

Joel H. Cohen
He just SHOULDN'T write in pair (examples: "The 7 Beer Itch", "Better Off Ned", "Left Behind" (season 32 & 31 & 29, SR AJ)). This worked only once: "'Tis the 30th Season" (season 30, SR AJ)
Also he just MUSTN'T write another THOH's (26, 27, 29 - really bland).
Cohen really keen on Lisa:lol:. Not, seriously most of his efforts involve Lisa: as "The Hateful Eight-Year-Olds" (the best of all) and "'Cue Detective" (seasons 31 & 27; both Selman's efforts); as "The Girl on the Bus" or "Teenage Mutant Milk-Caused Hurdles" (seasons 30 & 27, SR AJ) and others. Really seldom the episodes work (mentioned "The Hateful Eight-Year-Olds", "22 for 30", or "Gone Abie Gone" - seasons 31, 28, 24)

Conclusion: 1) Cohen wrote for Selman just twice ("Detective" and "Hateful"), but those were his good efforts by times;
2) usually episodes are weak (if not bad);
3) MUSTN'T write in cowriting (though it worked only once) or any THOH
4) statistically made by me:D, he's usually really bad, when write in the 2nd half, but can't determinate, when exactly;
5) Overall 6.5/10 - loveable hit-or-awful miss writer. He becomes more unpredictable in quality of some of recent efforts, though


P.S. I planned to write about all writers in one post, but perhaps, it'd take a lot of time, so I'll return yet.:)
 
prof. John Frink
The same remark, as for Cohen, he was bad for writing in partnership in 2 of 3 episodes ("The 7 Beer Itch" and "Left Behind"):rolleyes: Most of his episodes are Homer-centric or involve Homer (either in A or B-plot): "Go Big or Go Homer", "Left Behind", "Gone Boy", TH28, "Simprovised", "Love Is in the N2-O2-Ar-CO2-Ne-He-CH4", "Waiting for Duffman", "Black-Eyed, Please" etc. They're decent, at least. As for recent TH28, which was first effort if THOH's in 16 years, it was really nice-written, (despite the more glory to its animation). The only work under Selman so far is "Go Big or Go Homer", considered as one of the season's 31 weak, but IMHO, it way is not.

Conclusion
1) His scripts usually make a good impression;
2) Frink is Homer fan1998 - :aww: I mean, he likes Homer character to use in almost every his-written episode
3) this time just SHOULDN'T (not mustn't) write in cowriting;
4) according to statistics made by me :D hard to say something, cause he writes usually either near the start of production or near to the end - and every time unpredictable
5) overall 6.945/10 - very neat writer

Tom Gammill and Max Pross
This duo wrote just 5 episodes, of which only the first effort - "Hardly Kirk-ing" was really good. Though I liked also "The Old Blue Mayor She Ain't What She Used to Be". Other stuff is really poor ("Monty Burns' Fleeing Circus", "Whistler's Father", "3 Scenes Plus a Tag from a Marriage", "The Incredible Lightness of Being a Baby").
Conclusion
1) can't determinate similar episodes' style, except of they're all about family or kids:gatorshrug:
2) don't think, whether they were good, if were divided for solo writing:-/
3) no Selman-runned episode yet;
4) family topic;
5) according to statistics made by me :D they're unpredictable in quality :D (what the… 2nd writer in a row:lol:)
6) overall 4.4/10 - in general very bad writers

Al Jean
Also hasn't written much scripts in HD-era yet - just 7. And, important to remark the obvious, - HE IS WEAK IN PARTNERSHIP WRITING: "The 7 Beer Itch", "Better Off Ned", "Left Behind", and even "The Man Who Came to Be Dinner". In the same time his standalone episodes ("I Won't Be Home for Christmas", "Mr. Lisa's Opus", "Daddicus Finch" are really sweet, in any time of watching them). He said a while ago, he loves to write about Lisa, CBG (cause "he's similar to them") and Ned Flanders. But we can see Lisa-episodes the best (for some reason, he hasn't any writing credit for CBG episodes, but he definitely add his effort in writing process of them). Jean's episodes are always full of emotions (that was seen even in SD-era efforts) and.. and that's good feature.
Conclusion
1) Jean writing standalone, Jean writing in pair, and Jean showrunner are just 3 different people:lol:
2) loves write for Lisa, Ned Flanders and Comic Book Guy
3) emotions:)
4) no Selman-runned episode yet;
4) according to statistics made by me :D, he's the best at the start of production cycle (01-03) AND again, writing solo
5) overall 7.041/10 - good writer if he tries

Brian Kelley
His episodes always have good/interesting premise ("Wad Goals", "Livin La Pura Vida", "Lisa Gets the Blues", "The Marge-ian Chronicles") or implementation ("Livin La Pura Vida", "Woo-hoo Dunnit?", "The Serfsons", "Brick Like Me"). There are some misses, though (like his part "101 Mitigations" or "Specs and the City").
Conclusion
1) good/interesting premise/implementation;
2) isn't one of "just to get credit" writer... almost;
3) episodes has logical good conclusion;
4) good equinely as under Jean, as under Selman
5) according to statistics made by me :D… hard to say, his episode are mostly good in... whenever he writes:P;
6) overall 7.31/10 - good writer
 
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