Moe's Has Gone - My Fanscript

merzitar

. . .
Joined
May 22, 2009
Messages
1,654
Location
Berkshire, England
Hi, everyone. I wrote this episode a long time ago (about 2001) and typed it up in 2005. Back then, my spelling was awful, and the formatting was terrible, so I decided to clean it up a lot. Anyway, I hope you enjoy it and I would like your honest opinions on it. Thanks ^_^



Moe's Has Gone

Script:

(Song Plays)

INT.THE SIMPSONS HOUSE – DAY

Homer is sitting in front of the TV; watching the Krusty the Klown show.

Krusty (on the TV):
What do you get if you mix a rabbit with a horse?
A Doctorse! Ha Ha.

(Silence. . .)

Hey c’mon, it’s comedy!

Homer:
Oh. TV Sucks. There's never anything good on.

Bart Simpson enters the room.

Bart:
Hey, dad. Can I borrow...

Homer:
How much this time, BOY?

Bart:
$200.

Homer:
Ok- Hey, wait a minuet. What for?

Bart thinks of an excuse.

Bart:
(Food, Guns, Helping out the elderly!)
Helping out the elderly as those poor people can't even walk.

Homer:
Sorry Son, I Hate the elderly. Why do you think I put Grampa in a home?

Bart:
I mean the “YOUNGERLY”.

Homer:
Do you think I’m stupid?

Bart:
Yes.

Homer:
Ok here you go. Now I’m off to Moe’s.

Bart:
But dad, don't you need money to booze?

Homer:
Oh, son, I have Money.

Bart looks at Homer’s bank card, while Homer walks to the front door.

Bart:
I wonder. . .

Bart thinks of himself, purchasing a new car.

WOW!

Lisa enters the room, from upstairs and opens the front door.

Lisa:
Hi, dad. Bye, Mom. I’m off to Janie’s.

Marge:
Ok Lisa, have a nice day.


INT.MOE’S TAVERN - DAY

Gambler no.1:
Oh, tough luck, Moe. That’s all your money, plus more which, I assume you don’t have. HA HA.

Moe:
Oh, Shut up. C'mon, just one more chance?

Gambler no.2:
Maybe we will, if you give us a free DUFF each, eh?

Moe:
. . . Never mind. Just get out of my bar!

Homer enters the bar, through the main entrance.

Homer:
Hey Moe, What’s wrong?

Moe:
Look, Homer. I’ve been getting into trouble with loads of people, and they said that if I didn’t come up with $397,000 before May the 2nd at 12:00am, they will put me in jail for one year, then put me on the streets, so I’ve been gambling to get the money and...

Homer:
That’s tomorrow. Hey, can I have my beer?

Moe:
Oh yeah I forgot, sure.

Barney:
Hey, Moe? Get a job to get some money ~Burp~

Moe:
Uh, Barney- What do you think I’m doing, sitting on my fat a...

Homer:
Hey, Moe! Give me my beer, or I'll leave.

Moe:
Fine, you do that.

Homer screams.

Homer:
Ok Moe, you win. Just give my beer.

Moe:
Ok here, take it.

Homer:
THANK you


INT.JANIE’S HOUSE - DAY

Lisa enters Janie’s bedroom, and see’s Janie lying in her bed, ill.

Lisa:
Hey Janie, What’s wrong?

Janie’s Mom:
Oh Lisa, Janie has a flue that the doctor doesn’t know what it is, so I call it JANIE Flue.

Janie:
Come here, Lisa.

Lisa walks over to Janie, and to Lisa’s surprise, Janie coughs in Lisa's face.



INT.THE SIMPSONS HOUSE - EVENING

View of the front door, as it is knocked. Marge opens the door, to see Lisa standing there, looking very pale and uncomfortable.

Marge:
LISA, what’s wrong?

Lisa:
I caught the JANIE Flue from Janie. I’m going to my room.

Marge (as Lisa runs up the stairs):
Oh Dear!


THE NEXT DAY


INT.BANK OF SPRINGFIELD - DAY

Bart:
Ok, I wanna take out all of my money, right now.

Gil:
Hey, you don’t look much like Homer J Simpson. Too young, and not as fat?

Bart:
Look, I thought you need your money and job? Now gimme my money!

Gil:
Ah yeah ok, sir.

There is a montage of Bart, purchasing many items, using Homer’s card. Most of what he buys is expensive.


INT.MOE’S TAVERN – DAY

As Homer enters Moe’s, he slightly overhears Moe in the distance.

Moe:
Ah yeah.

Hugh Gass:
Where did you say you were going?

Moe:
Texas.

Homer approaches the bar.

Homer:
Hey Moe.

Moe:
Sorry Homer, you can't have a beer ‘cause I gotta leave town, as they're gonna make me do time.

Homer:
Where are you going?

Moe:
No Homer, I ain’t telling you ‘cause you'll tell everyone.

Moe slams the door to the backroom to get ready, as Homer sighs.


INT.THE SIMPSONS DINING ROOM TABLE – NIGHT

The Simpsons are eating their dinner.

Homer:
I feel sad to just see Moe fall flat on his butt!

Marge:
Oh Homie, you did what you could.

Homer:
Yeah, I guess your right.

Bart:
Hey, where is Lisa?

Marge:
Mmm... She is ill. I am going to take her to Dr. Hibbert’s tomorrow.


INT.HOMER AND MARGE'S BED – NIGHT

Homer and Marge are trying to sleep, when Marge hears Homer grumbling.

Marge:
Homer, go to sleep.

Homer:
Marge, I’ve figured it out - how to help Moe. I'm going to look for him and help him out with my money, starting tomorrow.

Marge:
Homer, No, Homie NO!

Homer:
I have to Marge, Moe is my best friend.

Marge:
Fine! Goodnight.


THE NEXT MORNING


INT.BANK OF SPRINGFIELD - DAY

Gil:
Sorry sir, but you took all of your money out yesterday.

Homer:
But that’s impossible, because I was… THE BOY!


INT.THE SIMPSONS HOUSE - DAY

Homer:
Bart, where’s my money?

Bart:

Uhh... I.. Kind of spent it all.

Homer:
Well, I’m afraid you’re going to have to take all of the crappy stuff you bought back, and give me my money.

Bart:
Oh jeez, why?

Homer:
It's grown up business

Bart:
… I don’t think I really want to know. Ok, I guess I’ll do it anyway.

Homer:
And I’ll come with you to make sure you take all of it back.


EXT.AROUND SPRINGFIELD’S TOWN - DAY

Homer and Bart are going around many shops to take the items that Bart bought, back to the shops for a refund.

Homer:
Is that all of it?

Bart:
Yeah, $500.000

Homer:
Good, Give it to me.

Bart:
Ok here.

Bart hands over the money and sighs.


INT.THE SIMPSONS HOUSE - NOON

Homer is sitting on the couch, as the front door is knocked several times. Homer then gets up and answers the door.

Homer:
Yello

Unidentified-Man:
Hello, Mr. Simpson? Do you know a Moe Sizzle-slack?

Homer:
Why yes, as a matter of fact I do.

Unidentified-Man:
Hmhm, well, he seems to have disappeared out of town. Do you know where he has gone?

Homer:
Look, if I knew I’d tell you, but I don't know, so good... Hey, wait a minuet. I overheard Moe talking to some guy, and he said something about Texas.

Unidentified-Man:
Thank you very much!

The unidentified-man slams the door very fast and loudly.

Homer:
(Sarcastically) THANK YOU.


EXT.THE SIMPSON’S YARD – AFTERNOON

Homer walks outside to gather the mail.

Ned:
Hi diddily ho, Homerino.

Homer:
What is it, Flanders?

Ned:
Well, Homer, I’m not angry, but you have had our TV stand for over 8 years now.

Homer:
So?

Ned:
I want it back.

Homer:
Oh, I get it, you want to fight about that?

Ned:
Please Homer, I might hurt you.

Homer:
Well I’m gonna punch you in the face, in 3…

Ned punches Homer and knocks him unconscious.

Ned:
Oh no, what have I done?


INT.FLANDER’S HOUSE - AFTERNOON

Ned runs to his phone and dials Reverend Lovejoy.


INT.LOVEJOYS HOUSE - AFTERNOON

The telephone rings as Lovejoy is watching TV. After groaning, he decides to answer the phone.

Lovejoy:

Hello, Ned?

Ned:
Reverend, I have done something bad!

Lovejoy:
What is it this time "laughed"?

Reverend Lovejoy hands up.


INT.DOCTOR HIBBERT’S - AFTERNOON

Marge:
Do you know what’s wrong with her, Doctor?

Dr. Hibbert:

Well, I’m afraid Lisa will be missing a few moths of school.

Marge:
Is there any medication I can give her?

Dr. Hibbert:
Well not really. (Chuckle)

Lisa:
What’s gonna happen to me?

D. Hibbert:
Not Much. You’ll get very ill, maybe loose your vocabulary, and may die. (chuckle)


THE NEXT DAY

INT.TEXAS POLICE DEPARTMENT - DAY

Unidentified-Man:
Excuse me sir, is a Moe Sizzle-slack here?

Squeaky-Voiced Teen:
Uh Wait Just a sec, please.

Squeaky-Voiced Teen turns around and performs a quick search on the computer’s database. The search returned with no results.

Sorry sir, but there’s no Moe Sizzle-slack here.

Unidentified-Man:
Bloody Hell! That human blimp must have lied to me.


INT.A BAR NAMED “WHORE-ENDOUS” – AFTERNOON

Moe is still betting to try and regain some money.

Moe:
What, I’m still losing?

Gambler 1:
Ha, that’s loads you owe us.

Moe:
Oh c'mon guy...

Gambler 2:
Go away, Moe.


EXT.ON THE ROAD TO TEXAS – EVENING

Homer is driving his car.


Homer:
Whew, it can't be that much further. I’ve already been driving for five hours!

Homer looks out the window to see a sign which reads “Texas: another three hours”.

Homer:
Oh, the hell with this.

Homer begins to speed, until he hears a police siren. The police car pulls Homer over to fine him.


Homer:
D’oh! Sorry officer, my finger slipped.

Policeman:

Give me your licence, H… Ahem.

Homer:
What’s a licence?

Policeman:
Your driver’s licence. Give me your driver’s licence.

Homer:
You see officer, the thing is… I forgot it!

Policeman:
Goddamn it, Homer.

Homer:
Moe, Is that you?

Officer Moe:
Yeah Homer, It’s me. The so called, MOE SIZZLE-SLACK… instead of Szylak.

Homer:
Moe I got you the money you need.

Moe looks at the money and counts it

Officer Moe:
What the… $500.000?

Homer:
Yeah

Moe:
Oh Homer, thank you, but I owe the gamblers as well.

Homer:
Tell ‘em to wait. I'LL get the money.


THE NEXT DAY


INT.MOE’S TAVERN - DAY

Barney:
Hey Moe, where have you been all this time?

Moe:
BARNEY FOR THE 6TH TIME, I’VE BEEN TO TEXAS

Barney:
Why?

Moe:
Barney, you’ll never change.

Homer:
Whoa that reminds me. I have to get home to Marge.

Moe:
How is ol' Midge doing there, anyway?

Homer:
Meh, The same ol' woman. Always nagging you know.

Moe:
Yeah that’s the thing about girls. They always nag. Well I assume so – I don’t really have many women. You know, due to my ugliness.

Homer:
Yeah. Anyway I got to get home.

Moe:
Ok. Once again, Homer. Thanks.

Homer:
No problem.

Homer and Moe both smile at each other.


INT.HOMER AND MARGE’S BEDROOM - NIGHT

Homer:
Well Marge. I helped Moe.

Marge:
Yes Homer, but.....

Homer:
But... What?

Marge:
Well... you did the right thing, but we needed the money for bills.

Homer:
Oh... He can wait.

Marge:
No Homer... Bills.

Homer screams.


Marge:
But don't worry, I can always use my money.

Homer:
Good you do that, Goodnight

Marge:
hmmm...... Goodnight Homer

END
 
I think this was a pretty good fanscript, but not perfect. I think you have good plots in this script, though it was a little overloaded at times with too much going on for one fanscript. I also think that you should have went into more detail with Bart's montage. I do like, however, that Bart's plot was connected to Homer's plot. Finally, I thought Lisa had a good, plot, but it felt out of place in this episode, especially since it was never resolved. Still, I enjoyed reading it. The humor was pretty good, I thought the edning was funny. I also think the characterization was done well. B

Sorry if I sounded like I was being too harsh.
 
No, you're not being harsh at all - I like it when people tell the truth and you have given me a good review ^_^.

Thank you for the B. I do agree that the Lisa plot was never resolved, and there didn't really need to be a third plot in the script.
Thanks again, D'ohmer.
 
it seemed kind of short, but otherwise it was pretty good. it doesn't seem like homer would instantly know bart was the one who took his money (At least to me) but overall nice, funny script.
 
Thanks for the comment. Yeah, I can see how that can seem weird, for Homer to suspect Bart. . . but then again, it's Bart we're talking about here! lol. And the length of it has always been something that bothered me. To be honest, I should have put more of Lisa's illness in, just for filler.
 
Back
Top