But in all seriousness, I've lived downtown Ann Arbor, downtown Detroit, and downtown Ypsilanti. I also used to live in Chicago. The Detroit area has a bit of a sprawl, but otherwise you can get anything that you want within a 45 minute drive, which, incidentally, is how long a trip on a bus or subway can take. Also, from my friends who've lived here and in LA, they say that LA is just the Detroit metro in the desert.
Yeah, I enjoy and defend southeast Michigan all the time, but there is just endless line malls and McMansions all over the place, often surrounded by urban rubble. Basically, Ypsi-Arbor, Ferndale/Royal Oak, and Midtown Detroit are the best things we've got going, as far as I'm concerned. I've often wished we could combine all those into one great city (aka what Detroit should be). But hey, there's a lot to appreciate here.