Arrest Record

FBI Profile

Banned Products








Homer: "Ohhh, chocolate. Ohhhhhhh, double chocolate! Ohh! New flavor! Triple chocolate! Perhaps a little something for the trip back to the cash register." 109K
Apu: "Yes, yes I know the procedure for armed robbery, I do work in a convienance store, you know. 55K
Apu: "You can emerge now from my chips, the opportunity to prove yourself a hero is long gone."
Homer: "Phewww."
Krusty: "Hey hey! What's goin' on here?!"
Wiggum: "Krusty the Clown, you are under arrest for armed robbery. You have the right to remain silent, anything you say, blah blah blah, blah blah blah, blah blah blah."
Krusty: "What is this? A joke?!"
News Reporter: "Kent Brockman is off tonight. Why did the clown cross the road? To rob a Kwik-E-Mart. The news story behind that inigmatic half joke right after this commercial message." 106K
Marge: "I know it looks very bad honey, but who knows, maybe it'll turn out he was innocent all along."
Homer: "Earth to Marge. Earth to Marge. I was there, the clown is G-I-L-L-T-Y."
Kent Brockman: "Good evening again Springfield. Krusty the Clown, the beloved idol of countless tots, now nothing more than a common, alledged criminal. His trial, which begins tomorrow, has taken center ring in a national media circus, as children of allll ages, from 8 to 80, hang on each new devolpment like so many romanian trapeze artists." 209K
Judge: "Krusty the Clown how do you plead?"
Krusty: "I plead guilty your honor." (Shocked gasps from the crowd) (Lawyer whispers in Krusty's ear) "Oh, oh, oh, I mean not guilty. Opening night jitters your honor."
Marge: "These toys are just adorable. Who'd guess they were inspired by such an insane criminal genius." 94K
Sideshow Bob: "My young friends, for years I have been silent, save for the crude glissandos of this wind instrument. But now, destiny has thrust me into the center ring. In the coming weeks, you will notice some rather sweeping changes in our programing. But pleased do not be alarmed, itchy and scratchy will still have a home here." 205K
Apu: "Okay, okay don't try anything funny, I'm armed to the teeth!" 51K
Apu: "Hey hey! This is not a lending library. If you're not going to buy that thing put it down or I'll blow your heads off!" 61K
Sideshow Bob: Reading from the "Man in the Iron Mask" "Next week, chapter 35 of the 'Man in the Iron Mask'" 166K
Sideshow Bob: Singing "Everytime We Say Goodbye" "Goodbye." 219K
Sideshow Bob: "And yet I can't help thinking about poor Krusty." (Crys...Sobbing...Sobbing turns into evil laughing) 177K
Guy: "Aww, well we can sign these contracts tomorrow."
Sideshow Bob: "Certainly. I take great pride in being able to sign my own name." (laughing and chuckling)
Sideshow Bob: "Hello children. Whom do you love?"
Kids: "Sideshow Bob!"
Lisa: "Common Bart, go with flow!"
Sideshow Bob: "How much do you love me?"
Kids: "With all our hearts!"
Bart: "About a zillionth as much as I love Krusty."
Sideshow Bob: "Open your heart. I admit I have some mighty big shoes to fill." ("big shoes to fill" repeats again and again)
Bart: "Wait a minute, you did it!"
Lou: "Kids' right"
Eddy: "Mmhmm."
Lou: "How'd you figure we missed that?"
Wiggum: "Get off your chops boys, get down to that studio."
Sideshow Bob: "Yes, I admit, I hated him. His hackneyed shenanigans robbed me of my dignity for years! I played the buffoon while he squandered a fortune on his vulgar appetites. That's why I framed Krusty! I would have gotten away with it too, if it weren't for these meddling kids."
Bart: "Take em' away boys."
Wiggum: "Well, we made a terrible terrible mistake. Uhhh, it won't happen again."
Krusty: "It better not you dimwit!"